1096 Days

Films and novels heighten our expectations of love and romance. Everyone is looking for the WOW factor. I think more often than not people are just in love with the idea of falling in love. We swim in a sea of romance, drinking in the words of authors such as Jane Austin only to find out that it's harder than you think think to find your Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth isn't as pretty or as clever as you thought.

Hearts get broken and people move on. Not everyone you meet makes your head tingle and they don't all say "You complete me!" - why is that? Because we live in a real world with real issues and feelings. You don't get a script each morning with a carefully crafted dialog that will bring out our sharp wit, our cute quirks or even leave us mysteriously speechless. We don't get a redo, a take two - or do we? With each relationship we can recreate ourselves, learning from our last relationship. 

Do I sound like a complete pessimist when it comes to love and romance? I'm not. I believe in happy endings I believe in finding that person that makes you feel like you fit. I looked for that person for a very long time and found a lot of bad fits and some okay fits, but in the end I just learned and moved on. Until I met Mad Dog. 

Meeting Mad Dog I found someone who has some of the same insecurities with relationships as me.  I found someone who got me. He understood that we were two separate people and yet when we were (are together) we are one. I will admit he puts up with a lot from me. I am not perfect and I can be difficult. I know this better than anyone. He has embraced each an every quirk about me. He was watched me grow and find new interests. I am still able to shock him and annoy him in the same breath. He loves me for that too. 

We were married 3 years ago today. Our wedding was not conventional at least on the surface, but honestly it's structure was very traditional. I walked down the aisle, someone gave me away, there were readings, vows and even a kiss. Granted there nothing traditional about any of those things. I walked down the aisle not to Canon in D Major or Here Comes the Bride, but to Cruel Angle's Thesis from Neon Genesis Evangelion.  My Father, who passed away several years didn't give me away, rather three dear and precious friends (Liz, Blue and Josephine). Our readings were not holy  or from the Bible, but from a comic book (Superman: For Tomorrow), a film (The Story of Us) and literature (In the Name of the Rose by Umbreto Eco). We had BBQ from Redbones in Somerville and a bounce house for the kids. Our cake was Rice Crispy Treats with SuperGirl and Green Lantern on top. We had a wedding to celebrate us and all the geekness what is us. 

I loved Mad Dog then and I still love him, maybe even more now. He has given me, given us two amazing children (have you seen them they are amazing looking - beautiful). He has done so much for me and continues to do so. To finish this post I would like to post the vows I said 3 years ago today to him. 

Michael thank you. For letting me be me. For letting me feel safe. For being my strong one. For loving me the way you do and reminding me each day just how much that is. 

You don't complete me. I don't think someone completes someone else. I do believe you compliment me. Without you my story could not be told. You are my Tracey to my Hepburn. Han to my Leia. Paul to my Holly (Breakfast at Tiffany's). Mr Darcy to my Elizabeth. Mr Big to my Carrie - though you won't believe it. Lastly Smallville to my Lois. 

I promise to continue to support you the best way I can and know how. I will compliment you and try to remind you each day that I love and just how much that is. Having promised this, I end with: 

The band comes from Barry Allen - 

He was always rooting for us...

The rock is from an arrow...

The question is from me.

Will you marry me today? 

Happy Anniversary Mad Dog! Love you! 

Falling into Place...I Hope

It is six days until I marry Mad Dog. With us pretty much doing everything from the programs to cooking for our vegetarian friends things are a little crazy. I'm currently printing the programs, since the lovely people at Staples were no help with the paper I purchased from Paper Source. Hopefully the ink holds out.

Also today, poor Mad Dog had to go the the Emergency Room this morning. He has a toothache and looks like it's infected. His right side of his face is all puffy. They managed to get him on his way fast, with some pain-meds and antibiotics. They say the Puffiness will go away in a few days. He's worried about the wedding and looking terrible. I'm going to be optimistic about it and know that it will be okay.

On top of all the worries I have with planning, I have to worry about getting stuff done with Little Man & Miss G in tow. Don't think it would be so bad if Miss G was a little more independent and able to help out. I think I'm just stressed today and that is why things are hitting me harder. Staples couldn't do the programs because the weight of the paper. I stopped at the store to pick-up chicken nuggets, water and coffee mate - I ended up picking up High School Musical 2 the Junior Novel for Miss G too. Problem is...the water which wasn't leaking when I first picked it up, was by the time I paid for it and was about to leave. Meaning I had to get another one, and find a staff member to change it. Then we get out to the car and Miss G asks for her book. I go to look for it in my one bag..and nothing! I asked if she could be a big girl and sit in the car with Little Man, while I ran in, and she freaked out. We all had to get out of the car again and go back in. So frustrating.

I have to be up very early tomorrow to drive out to my new job. It's going to be a long day for me. Hopefully tonight will be quiet. I'm doubting it, but you can always hope.

Finding the Glass Slipper

Today I managed to find my second dress for the wedding. Something that I thought might be a hell of a lot harder then it was with Little Man and Miss G in tow. I don't think it's what I originally started looking for, but it is one of the right colors and I do like it. Also managed to find sandals and a headband I might (might) wear.

The dress is chocolate brown as you can see. I'm hoping Mad Dog likes it, though I know he'll say he does no matter what he thinks. I still have so much to do before the wedding. Don't really know how it'll all happen - though I know it will (it kind of has too). Between all this we still have Little Man's Baptism this coming Sunday. Again not too sure how we're getting though it all.

Hope I can run to the finish line in heels.